4. When I Gave Up On Manifesting, And Did This Instead, EVERYTHING CHANGED
I’ve been obsessed with the idea of manifesting since my grandma bought me The Secret. Once I learned this concept, I created vision boards to cover my walls, notebooks filled with affirmations, and a Pinterest board dedicated to the “dream life” I was working tirelessly to call into existence.
And most things I have ever asked for have come to fruition. But something I’ve recently realised is after months of pouring my energy into ‘trying to manifest’, I felt stuck and often frustrated.
No matter how hard I tried, my dream home, the thriving career, and the love life seemed so far away.
But that was the issue, I was trying, instead of realising that manifesting was something I did naturally, I saw it as a task that I had to set aside time to focus on.
I wasn’t living in the present.
I was so focused on the future that I had forgotten about the power of now. That’s when I decided to stop trying to manifest and instead focus on something deeper.
Alignment.
The Moment I Stopped Trying to Manifest
I specifically remember a time when I was sitting at my desk, frustrated that Kitaka wasn’t taking off in the way I had hoped,
I asked myself, “I’m doing everything right, why isn’t this working?”.
I burst into tears from the frustration of it all. My sister was at home that day and reassured me everything would be fine, she encouraged me to take a break from work and do something fun, like watch a film to take my mind off of it.
Together we decided to watch one of my favourite films, Moana, a film that is the epitome of escapism and fantasy that would easily help me to forget the pressures of my current reality.
But it was what happened once the film was over where the magic was found…
Watching the film completely shifted my mood from feeling sad and exhausted to happy and hopeful, but it was time to get back to work.
I opened my emails and straight away saw an offer from a company asking if I would like to participate for free at their event showcasing my products.
They were struggling to find a makeup brand they liked and Kitaka was exactly what they were looking for! Long story short, I did the event, built up a massive database of new customers and Kitaka instantly saw success it never knew before.
In that moment, it dawned on me, that I was putting all my energy into doing manifestation, rather than being the kind of person who naturally attracts what they desire.
I decided instead of asking “When will this happen?” I shifted my focus to feeling good, living in the moment, and aligning with the type of life I wanted. Within weeks, I started to notice small yet powerful shifts, opportunities that aligned with my passions began to appear effortlessly.
Manifestation Is Something You Do Naturally
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learnt was realising that manifesting isn’t something you need to force.
Manifestation is not a chore, a piece of homework, or a process you have to meticulously follow.
It’s something we do naturally when we are in alignment with our true selves.
Think about it like this:
When you’re happy and relaxed, don’t you notice good things seem to happen?
When you focus on gratitude, don’t you attract more things to be grateful for?
When you live authentically, don’t people, opportunities, and experiences that resonate with you flow into your life?
I know for sure, that anytime I was on a night out with friends or on holiday with family or even just listening to music in my room, exes would reach out from nowhere with apologies for being a fool and requesting updates on my life.
When I think about times when I’ve heard from distant friends, made new friends, been given job opportunities, made lots of money, or even seen changes in health and fitness, I was always in a state of flow, and not a state of forcing it.
Manifestation isn’t about making something happen, it’s about being in a state where the right things can flow to you. Just like a magnet, the stronger your alignment, the stronger the response you receive from the universe.
Putting My Attention on Alignment Instead
When I stopped obsessing over manifestation, I turned my attention to the one thing that made this process much easier, and that was alignment.
This felt easier to manage and much more fun to do, living my life in a way that felt good and authentic. Here’s what that looked like:
Prioritising Self-Care:
I started listening to my body. If I needed rest, I rested. If I felt inspired, I acted. I learned that taking care of myself was the foundation for everything else.
Taking Inspired Action
Instead of rigidly following manifestation “rules,” I asked myself, “What would feel good right now?” I started doing more of what lit me up—whether that was reading a book, going for a walk, or creating something for my blog.
Trusting the Process
Admittedly, I found this one quite difficult to do, I guess I have a few control issues, but it is because I know best lol!
But I had to give up and come to terms with the fact that I don’t always know best and the universe knows the best and fastest way for my desires to come through. Letting go of the “how” or “when” allowed me to turn over that part of the deal to the universe and trust it knew what I wanted. My job was to focus on the feeling I wanted—peace, freedom, abundance.
Living as If
Rather than pinning my happiness to some future goal, I asked, “What would the best version of me do today?” For me, this looked like dressing up for myself, showing up for myself, being intentional with my routines, and enjoying the present moment as if I already had my dream life.
What Happened When I Let Go & Focused on Alignment
When I shifted my focus from trying to manifest to living in alignment, things suddenly felt easier.
It’s not like everything changed overnight, but small things that mattered were happening. My blog began gaining more traction, I felt confident enough to start a Youtube channel, and opportunities I hadn’t even imagined began coming my way.
Some of the things I was chasing so hard before manifested anyway because my energy was directed that way.
But this time, they came in ways I couldn’t have planned or predicted, like when someone from the community offered to teach me private sessions of Pilates when I expressed I was looking for online teachers.
It reminded me that the universe has its own timing and methods, ones that are often better than anything I could have forced or controlled.
Key Takeaways
If you’re feeling stuck or frustrated with the concept of manifestation, here’s what I would say:
Stop chasing. Shift your focus from wanting to being. Embodiment is key.
Focus on alignment. Live in a way that feels good to you, romanticise your life, and trust that your desires will follow.
Let go of the timeline. Manifestation works on divine timing, not deadlines.
Remember it’s natural. You are already manifesting every moment of every day through your thoughts, feelings, and actions.
Finally…
I didn’t give up on my dreams, I gave up on the struggle, I gave up forcing something that didn’t need to be forced. And that was the key to letting everything flow.
Now, the affirmation I remind myself of is: The more aligned I am, the more things work out for me.
Try it for yourself and watch what happens.
